Why must people judge?

Today I told my mom the news via phone that I'm pregnant. She didn't take it well (as expected) and I'm ok with that. We may not speak for a few months now but I'm okay with that also. I made a decision 3 years ago when I got married that I was going to live my life for ME and do what makes ME happy. I understand her reasonings behind why she doesn't agree with my decisons. Her reasons are that she doesn't like my husband, she doesn't think we are stable enough for another child yet, and she doesn't like children so it's bad news to her anyway. College isn't for everyone, I went through 3 years of college before I just lost interest in it and looked for work. Ever since I was a little girl my dream was to be a mother and I always wanted children. Once I gave birth to my son I had a whole new perspective on life and I enjoy taking care of my son and being a wife. I hate getting judged because I don't have a degree, I hate getting judged because of my age, and I hate getting judged because we are lower income. We work hard for everything we have and we aren't on any assistance for anything. Why must we always get judged and looked down upon by elders?

Mommy Guilt?

Yesterday I got home from work and dived into my couch to take a much needed nap around 4pm. SIX hours later I woke up, shocked that I had slept that long. I didn't cook dinner, play with DS, or get any chores done around the house. I feel so bad for being so tired and slacking in the wife/mommy department I feel so bad :( I then proceeded to stay awake until 2am knowing I had to wake up at 4:30am for work. Pregnancy induced lethargy, gotta love it. My husband has been so wonderful and understanding about this but I just feel so bad for not being able to spend more time with DS.

  Another thing that has been bothering me is the fact that I haven't told any of my family about this pregnancy yet. I'm partially scared of their reaction and partially terrified of something bad happening and having to tell them about it. I'm pretty close with my mom and it feels akward for her not to know, but hubby thinks we should wait until we go to our first appointment at least. Today I'm feeling a little better but still pretty tired. Happy hump day bloggies! :)

Guess who else is Pregnant?

I'm 5w1d today and in less than one week we will get to see our little bean! DH has to work that day and I don't think he can get it off or leave early so I might be going solo with DS or I may beg my MIL to come with me so she can watch DS while I'm getting my ultrasound. It's still feeling somewhat surreal but each day that passes (as I get more hungry and nauseous at the same time) it begins to feel more real.
 In non-related pregnancy news my weekly to do list has been ignored since we got the BFP! I've been so freaking tired, I know I've said this a million times but it's like something I can't describe (lethargic maybe?) No matter how much sleep I get I feel exhausted. I guess that's totally normal for the beginning stages and my body is working hard growing our little bean so I know that's whats causing the fatigue. Today I'm going to work on a few items on my list our house looks like a tornado came through kudos to my son lol. Guess who is else pregs?

FERGIE!! I love her! Her husband is nice on the eyes also :D



anddd I got some maternity pants from Jessica Simpson's line! I had no idea that she had a maternity line I love Jessica Simpson! She has the cutest style that I wish I could wear heels while pregnant but I'm not brave enough.

This was on Valentine's Day look how cute she looks :)

First Trimester must haves!

                         


I just started getting a wave of promising symptoms! Here they are:

-nausea
-fatigue
-increased appetite
-dry mouth/increased thirst
-frequent urination
-random cravings (steak, ground beef)
-mood swings

I'm also feeling rather round :p I'm 4w3d today and it's really starting to sink in. We've told a few more people because I we couldn't keep our mouth shut. I've started going to bed wayyyy earlier than usual (around 9/10pm) and leaving DH and J to fend for themselves lol. All day long I've been so tired! No matter how long I nap, or how many hours of sleep I get at night I feel exhausted the entire day. I'm missing my cup of joe in the mornings! I've started getting the morning sickness (aka all day sickness) but it's really bad in the morning. When I wake up in the morning I feel like I went out drinking the night before haha and enjoyed the night too much. Here's a list of items that I need to survive the first tri:

1. Preggie Pops- you can find these at the pharmacy and they are a total life saver! Helped me out last time with light nausea.
   
   

2. Sea bands- these things are AWESOME! I started using these when I was vomiting 1-2 times per day and nauseous all day. These WORK! You can find them at the pharmacy also.



Amazon description:The anti-nausea band gently stimulates the nei-kuan acupoint located between your palm and wrist by placing a constant pressure on that point.

3. Gummy Prenatals, because my nausea has kicked in and I have a hard time swallowing pills :)


4. Belly band- They say you start showing faster with your second child and I already feel super bloated. I'm going to invest in a belly band so I can just unzip my pants and put the belly band over them to hold my pants up.


5. Lots of WATER and SALTINE CRACKERS- I've been so thirsty and nauseous but these items seem to help with the nausea.

To any of my preggo bloggies reading this, I hope you don't have morning sickness, it's no fun. My last resort will be to get a Zofran prescription if it gets bad, which is what I had to do with DS when I couldn't keep anything down. 11 more days until our ultrasound, WOO HOO! I wonder if we'll have twinsies?

Testing, Testing, 123!

I made my first OB appointment! It will be March 4th. at 1pm and I'm getting an ultrasound for dating purposes so I'm very excited! In order to reassure myself I'm going to test a few more times until then to make sure the lines are getting progressively darker. I TOLD A FEW PEOPLE!! We were planning on waiting to tell the world but I just couldn't keep my big mouth closed haha. I told my MIL because I knew she would be happy for us, and my boss walked in on my phone conversation with the doctor's office so she found out! I texted one of my good friends and told her because I was bursting with excitement. I'm not telling anyone else though until well after 12 weeks when the risk of miscarriage decreases. I'm starting to realize this pregnancy gig is going to be much harder with a toddler! When I was pregnant with my first child I would sleep, for HOURS and relax when I didn't feel well. Now it's not that easy, I'm very glad my husband has stepped up and washed laundry, vacuumed, helped with baby, etc. he's such a sweetheart! I'm only 4w2d and I feel so so sleepy, just plain exhausted. No matter how long I sleep I don't feel rested that's my only symptom really. I also have a bigger appetite and I've been having mood swings (similar to bad PMS lol). I'm just praying the morning sickness isn't bad this time around it usually hits me around 5/6 weeks. I'll be investing in some preggie pops and seabands when that time comes. Ah, the many joys of pregnancy haha :)
Here's my latest test:

BFP=Big Fat Positive

We did it! I tested positive today on a First Response test. My estimated due date will be October 26, 2013 we're over the moon! I'll update tomorrow with details.

Last week of 2WW...

I'm questioning my O date because I didn't use opks this cycle or temp so there is no way to know for sure when I ovulated. I do however know that my longest cycle has lasted 30 days so I'm expecting my period by Wednesday February 20th. at the latest. I'm holding out until Thursday morning to test. I've felt some random pulling and twinges today, and I'm still exhausted! I'm happy to have the next two days off work, I plan to catch up on some rest and get some chores done around the house. Signing off for now, toodles!

Much better day

                   

       Today is a much better day. I'm over the Valentine's Day disappointment. DH bought me a card and some flowers after he saw how my feelings were hurt but at that point the damage was already done. He mistakenly bought me the same exact card as last years (I save his cards that he buys me) and the only difference was last years card he wrote "I love you baby" and this year he didn't write anything. Ah well, maybe I need to stop expecting anything thoughtful  from him for special occasions because he just doesn't get it.
 I tested yesterday, BFN of course and I'm sure AF will rear her ugly head on Monday. I'm considering temping next cycle and might try some soy to help get a stronger O but we'll see. Today is supposed to get up to 50 degrees out so I may take DS for a walk outside or to the park because I've been slacking in the exercise department. Remember the exercise buddy I was supposed to have? Well it never happened. I never had the chance to make it to the gym because DH has been working more hours and we never have a sitter. So it looks like I will need to find other ways besides going to the gym to exercise. I'm sad my walk at home dvd is ruined because Jace decided to scratch all over it  play with it and now it won't work.
   My plans for this weekend are to get some exercise in, monthly chore list, and spending time with DH and Jace. My eating has been awful too (donuts, candy, soda, oh my!) and with summer approaching I really want to reach my goal by April 26th. which is totally attainable. Have you notice a shift in this blog more cursing and such? Oh, I forgot to add I'm one of those potty mouthed moms hope it doesn't bother anyone who reads this, and I LOVE those ECARDS they are fucking hilarious.

TGIF!! I can sleep in all weekend and lay around, enjoy my free time and do nothing SAID NO PARENT EVER. I don't understand how a person can be "tired" when they got more than 6 hours sleep. Seriously people?

How we met, Part III

      Happy Valentine's Day everyone!

                        

I thought today would be the perfect day to tell the final chapter so far of our love story. If you didn't get a chance to read How we met Part II and How we met Part I make sure you catch up to get the background information :)

   Our first year of marriage was tough. We had a ton of fights, some infidelity, and a miscarriage. We weren't by any means your typical newlyweds having gone through all of that but we somehow managed to work on things and now we are stronger than ever. In February of 2011 we were on month 2 of trying to conceive after our loss. We used preseed and OPKS that month and I tested at 8dpo and got a faint BFP, and then a for sure BFP the next day!! We had our ulstrasound around 6 weeks and that's when we got the heartbreaking news; we were carrying TWINS and one of them wasn't going to make it. Baby A's heartbeat was 170 and Baby B's heartbeat was only 90. I was told that it was very unlikely Baby B would make it and that I would most likely miscarry again. When it came time for my 12 week ultrasound I got the news that I had miscarried the other baby. I never bled or anything but I did have cramps. The doctor told us that everything was absorbed by Baby A and that we had a vanishing twin. We mourned the loss of our baby and prayed hard that Baby A would be okay. I switched doctors and found an amazing place to finish out the rest of my prenatal care. 
   At 32 weeks, I woke up in the middle of the night feeling like I had peed my pants and went to the bathroom. As I looked in the toilet, there was blood everywhere and I freaked out. We called my OB and she said to go to the Emergency room. Once I got there they ran some tests on me and gave me an ultrasound. I later found out I had a placenta abruption and the baby was in distress. We would have to have a scheduled c-section and hope to keep the baby baking until we reached full term. A few days later while being monitored his condition got worse and he wasn't thriving in the womb (2-3 weeks behind in growth, not getting proper nourishment from the Placenta) so they made the decision to give me an emergency c-section at 32 weeks 5 days. I gave birth our son Jace Martin September 17, 2011 and he weighed 3lb. 50z. 17in.
   Now we have been married for almost 3 years and Jace will be 2 in September, time flies! :*

note: This post was actually written yesterday, hence the good mood I was in when I wrote it.
  

Valentine's Day disappointment (Vent)

I'm just not feeling the spirit this year and I usually love Valentine's Day. DH couldn't even manage not to be rude to me this morning let alone wish me a Happy Valentine's Day. Even when I said to him that it's Valentine's Day and I told him he didn't even say anything, no Happy V day babe, no have a good day, nothing and I know he probably won't get me anything. I kind of feel really sad about this I could cry. He did this last year also it's just another day to him now :(

My mom offered to babysit so we could go to dinner and she said she was cooking a big dinner at home. She called me up yesterday to tell me that my stepdad suprised her with reservations and her exact words were "why would he do that if he knew I would have Jace" and "aww I thought it was so sweet of him, I wish I could go" then I told her that we would just stay home. She calls me and tells me that she can definitely watch Jace last night because she was upset with him for whatever reason and then calls me again this morning telling me how he bought her lingere and now she feels bad and definitly is going.

Were you able to keep up with all the back and forth? I hardly was. I think she just didn't want to watch him but whatever. I can't take him with us because he wants to explore and walk around and will throw a tantrum if we sit him in a high chair for too long. So all in all my Valentine's Day will suck. I'm just so hurt that my husband didn't do anything out of the ordinary to make me feel special, something as small as kissing me this morning and telling me to have a nice day was all I was looking for. Have a better day than me everyone. 

Excuse my french:

Bedtime battle

Remember the bedtime issue we were having? Well it's started again *sigh*

Jace didn't take a nap for the entire day on Monday (my day off) and then around the early evening he napped until 11pm, which at that point he WOULD NOT GO BACK TO SLEEP. When I say we tried everything to get him back to bed (bath, more food, warm milk, rocking him, turning TV off, reading a book, etc.) we tried EVERYTHING! He wouldn't go back to sleep and cried everytime we would lay him down in his crib. He would stand up, start bouncing up and down and giggling (in an evil mwhahahaha kind of way lol) and yelling dada and baba. Finally around 1am he simmered down and by 2am he was asleep. I went to bed a little after 2am and then woke up at 4am to get ready for work. Then when I got off work Jace was full of energy due to the long nap he took at daycare (I'm convinced that they let him sleep the entire time and ignore my wishes to limit nap time to one hour or less) and he was running around the house playing and once again when it was time for bed he wouldn't go to sleep. He didn't go to bed until after midnight again, I lost track of the time after that. I think we're losing this bedtime battle, and Jace knows it.

I wish it were this easy:

Looking Bleak..

So I've been off work for the past two days, hence my absense from the blog. I've tested three times with the same result each time being a BFN. I used a FRER and even morning urine and still negative, not even an evap line to obsess over. I know it's early but as I've stated  9 dpo is a turning point in my cycle when I start to lose hope. I did get a positive with Jace at 8 dpo, why not this time right?

I'm insane, but that's what TTC does after almost a year. It makes you insane lol. Here is my "bfp" at 8dpo with Jace 2/21/2011 (A real squinter huh?)



and then at 9 dpo:


Right now I'm 10dpo and I'm waiting until tomorrow (11dpo) to test again. I won't test until the afternoon time though and best believe my fingers and toes are crossed! That is all!

Pregnant Celebs

It feels like everyone around me is pregnant and I keep hearing news on FB and even on tabloids lol. I get a little jealous when I hear someone is pregnant but these are my favorite preggo celebs:

1. Kim Kardashian (am I the only person who isn't sick of her lol) I'm guessing a little boy is arriving for Kim and Kanye.

2. Kate Middleton (Isn't she adorable?!?!) There has been speculation Kate is carrying twins but I think a singleton little girl is on the way :)


3. Jessica Simpson (LOVE HER STYLE) Jessica has such good fashion sense and I love her little family! I'm going to guess a BOY for Jessica.


4. Shakira, she looks great here! I'm no sure what she's having but she looks good to be so far along I wish I could have taken a pic like this while pregnant but my stretch marks wouldn't allow it lol.


Cycle update: I'm 6 dpo and feeling PMS symptoms along with increased cm, 3 more days until I can test!!

ETA: I dug up one of my last belly pics I think this was 24 weeks, can't wait to be huge again lol :)

5 DPO and still sane, I swear!

 

                               

I lied. I can't wait until Valentine's day to test! Who was I kidding haha, I'm testing in 3 days at 8 dpo and even though my sane mind tells me that it's too early let's face the facts: I'm a POAS addict! The plan is still to wait until Valentine's Day to tell the hubby though. No symptoms to report yet, and I'm trying to keep busy and not think about things too much because I can get a bit obsessive. A winter storm is headed our way tonight and we are projected to get 1-2 feet of snow over the next 2 days. My plan is to work and continue to do our monthly checklist to stay busy. Of course being a mama my "free" time (what is that?) is limited so if your reading this please cross your fingers for me to get my BFP!

Fit Momma: How we met- Part II

Fit Momma: How we met- Part I:    In case you’re wondering how I met the hubby here is our love story filled with so much drama there will more than likely be a part III bar...

                                 Part II Engagement & I do 

Part II of this story begins with me leaving for college 2 hours away and us having a long distance relationship. It brought us closer together and we missed each other so much. Jose would come to visit me nearly every other weekend and I would go back home frequently to see him. The next semester Jose enrolled in my college and moved to the same town as me. We decided to get our first place together and we moved to a quaint apartment near our school. I'm not going to say we lived in bliss but we fought a lot and made up a lot during that time. We were coming into our adulthood and learning how to manage a household. We stayed there for about 5 months and we decided to move back to our home town together. I moved in with Jose's family until we found an apartment and that was when the trouble began.
   I didn't get along with my brother-in-law's girlfriend because he told her that he knew me and she went all psycho crazy biotch on me (as in steal my clothes and cut them up in a kind of way no kidding) and we got into an altercation over this! Finally after a 2 year engagement, breaking up and making up and going through all the in law drama we were married on August 20, 2010 at city hall. We decided against a big wedding due to all the family drama. We spent our honeymoon at a lake 45 minutes away and just relaxed and enjoyed each other's company. It felt good to be married and to know that I would get to spend the rest of my life with my best friend. We had our whole lives ahead of us, and this was just the beginning! We moved into our new place right after we got married and settled into marriage life rather quickly. Stay tuned for part 3 which will include when we started TTC and having our son.

How we met- Part I

   In case your wondering how I met the hubby here is our love story filled with so much drama there will more than likely be a part III bare with me we're been together almost 6 years and we've been through a lot but I'm glad we're in such a good place now <3

                                                          High School Sweethearts..

   It was the spring of 2006 and I had just moved to another town with my mom and stepdad (I was only 16 years old). I was an only child and pretty lonely but I made friends fast and frequented the local park to meet new people. There was a park around the corner in the nieghborhood that we moved into and the local teens would go to play basketball and socialize. I remember the day I met my husband Jose he was pretty shy and didn't come across agressive to me like the other guys around, which really attracted me to him. It's funny because I curse the day that this happened his brother actually pursued me and it never went any furthur than a hug but it came back to bite me in the ass down the road. Jose and I became friends, and although he let me know that he thought I was attractive and might be interested in me he respected me and never asked me out or anything. I was so young and still focusing on my studies so we lost touch for about a year even though we lived around the corner from each other and would run into each other on the way to school sometimes.
     Fast forward a year later and I meet a new friend named Tammy (name changed for privacy reasons) who worked with me and also knew Jose and his friends. She would talk about them and then it got me wondering how he was doing, it's funny because I had his house phone number memorized from when his brother had given it to me a year ago and I randomly called to say hi to Jose. He answered and was suprised to hear from me but he gave me his cell number and we started hanging out. We would talk for hours on the phone about everything and everyday I looked forward to seeing him in the morning so we could walk to school together. He asked me out August 21, 2007 and I said YES of course I was so excited and head over heels about him. Remember we were 17 and 18 at this time so it was appropriate for him to ask me to "go steady" with him oh lord I sound like my mother shoot me. We went to prom together and graduated high school. I was just so in love and the first year was AMAZING, we spent so much time together and got to know each other.
        August 21, 2008 was our one year anniversay and Jose popped the question over dinner and I said YES of course lol. I picked up my menu and he placed a black box underneath and I gasped and asked him what it was, I opened it and there was a beautiful engagement ring. I was heading off to college that fall and wondered would we make it work having a long distance relationship. Stay tuned for our love saga story part 2 coming soon! :)

Welcome to the two week wait- 2 DPO

This is totally me haha!! I get so crazy during my two week wait! I commence to blowing all my money on hpts, googling every "symptom", and yes, going on twoweekwait.com to compare my symptoms to others LOL. What would I do without the internet? 

   I'm assuming I ovulated sometime over the past 3 days due to the ewcm, increase in sex drive, and O pains but I'll use today as my official O date to be safe. I'm excited for this cycle because we had the perfect timing for sex (twice a day, day before, day of, and day after O) and I layed on my stomach for 3-5 minutes after to help our chances. I'll update everyday with my symptoms, so far today I don't feel anything besides nauseated which I always feel in the mornings if I don't eat enough.

    I'm a pretty early tester so I'm testing on Valentine's day which would be so special if I could get my BFP that day and share it with DH! I got pregnant this time of year three years ago with Jace, ovulated on Valentine's Day though and got my BFP that cycle. Come on VDAY BFP!!

6 weight loss tips for moms

                            

So after having my baby I found myself flabby, 35+ pounds overweight, and the weight just wasn't coming off with breastfeeding. Here are my top 10 exercises that helped me lose 60 pounds (35 pounds of "baby" weight and 25 vanity pounds) and get back in shape. They are all easy things you can do at home or with baby. Enjoy!

1. Walking
  I walked everywhere with my baby (weather permitting). This allowed both of us to get some fresh air and save gas money. You would be suprised the amount of calories you can burn while briskly walking and pushing you baby in the stroller.

2. Work out videos
    Can't make it to the gym? This one isn't as easy as just walking but if you can invest some money in a few exercise DVD's I recommend Leslie Sansone's walk at home series it's a great tape to get you started and get you used to working out. While baby is sleeping you can do a 45 minute tape which equals 4 miles, you burn a meal in 45 minutes!

3. Diet-
Weight loss is all about calories in vs. calories burned and if your in a defecit you will drop the pounds. If you are breastfeeding you can't cut your calories too far back but eating healthy foods and cutting out processed foods and soda will make all the difference.

4. Crunches!
  Crunches will get your stomach back to prepregnancy shape in no time! I also would do planks to flatten the belly. There are apps you can download with belly routines.

5. Breastfeeding
   If you are able to breastfeed I would highly reccomend it, there are so many benefits for baby and mama and it also helps you to lose that baby weight faster.

6. Chores
   Doing chores around the house like vacuuming, sweeping, scrubbing the bathtub all burn calories. Easy work out for mom and you get some cleaning done all in one.

I walked Jace to daycare today and my legs are so sore now! I love feeling sore because that means I did something right :D

Hello Ovulation!

    Cycle day 13 and I have EWCM, otherwise known as egg white cervical mucous (gross I know) along with an increased sex drive and twinges in my pelvic area so I'm pretty sure today or tomorrow is ovulation day!! We have been going at it like teenagers so our bases are covered and I'm excited our timing has been stellar this month. Jace is feeling much better and doesn't have a fever anymore so we put him back in daycare, and the hubs as been working a lot of overtime so we've been pretty busy.
 I can't believe it's February already where did the time go? I have a bunch of things I want to get done this month to prep for spring cleaning. I will keep our to do list on my blog here so I can stay motivated to actually do them lol.

February To do list:
-paint apartment
-deep clean and organize our bedroom
-get rid of all clothes that no longer fit
-donate some of Jace's baby clothes
-continue doing weekly chore checklist
    *sweep/mop floors
     *vacuuming
     *cleaning Jace's bedroom daily
     *cleaning toilet/tub
      *disinfect/sanitze countertops
      *laundry
      *weekly decluttering
I think that's all for now folks. I'll update at the end of the month on how it goes for us.